THE DAY I CRAVED FOR PARATHA

Today I woke up with a craving to eat Paratha Sandwich for breakfast. A paratha is a flat bread and is a  Indian delicacy that has been on my fave foreign food list  I've tried back when I was in Abu Dhabi.

Actually I have 2 favorite variance of paratha sandwich, one is the Omelet Paratha Sandwich, It is served with egg, tomato and cream cheese filling.

The other one is the Fresh garden Sandwich.. it is the one stuffed with various veggies like cucumber, lettuce
carrots and tomatoes and some spices to taste.

 Enjoying these two every morning comes in very handy for me because there are lots of Indian restaurant in every corner of the street where I live in.

But unlike any ordinary day when I am haunted with this craving, today will be a "challenge" for me to get myself a paratha... simply because I am currently in Manilaand finding an indian restaurant here may not be too accesible and convenient.

Instead of bothering myself to find a resto nearby, I decided to just make one on my own (Why not?!)

An Indian friend of mine have taught me before how to prepare this kind of bread and the ingredients are all present in my kitchen so there's no reason for me to not to try.

For the paratha bread, here are the ingredients:

1 cup of wholewheat flour
1/4 cup of water
1 teaspoon corn oil
a pinch of salt to taste

For the filling:

1 medium size egg
2 medium size tomatoes
1 teaspoon cream cheese
a pinch of ground black pepper

And soo cooking the paratha bread is at first tricky because I can't do the perfect shape but the taste is more important to me so I  just simply ignore the idea of how perfect it will appear hahahah!

Preparing the filling is as easy as ABC...ha!

Finally, the finish product....

Today, this sandwich have somewhat brought me again to a place in time where my mornings were spent walking on the alley of abu dhabi (while munching my breakfast)catching my bus service.... ohhh fun memories! ;)

And yes, it feels nice to be able to write something again after almost five (5) months of being lazy a lad :P

FROM THE HEART OF AN OFW

About  3 years ago, I was compelled to make a decision to pursue a career abroad to sustain the financial needs of my family.

To be an OFW (Overseas Filipino Worker) is most probably the archetype avenue of every filipino who would like to provide financially for their loved ones.

Leaving was never easy, in fact it’s the hardest feeling I've been through, primarily because I am a mother and to be away from my little one feels unbearable and sure it is. From the moment I stepped inside the NAIA airport and waved goodbye to my daughter and up to that instant I am seated on the plane, I’ve embraced melancholy. 

I can still remember when I was seated on the window side of the plane as it ascends, I was looking outside and I am telling myself, “this is it, there’s no turning back now”. Of course there’s no chance I could turn back anymore as we are feet above the ground and it would mean death if I do. Kidding aside, I was heavy hearted, I close my eyes and tried to convince myself that it will be okay and all the hurts I am feeling is just temporary and I will get use to it afterward. I have in my mind all practical reasons why I need to leave, this is a sacrifice I need to endure to give a better future my daughter deserves.

On the way, I am a bit worried about what awaits me in the foreign land where I will be working. I am afraid that I might as well experience maltreatment and abuse that some of our “kababayans” have suffered of, those that I usually see when watching news.

 I don’t want to go home in a box, lifeless, a cadaver. My goal is to be stable, save enough money for my daughter’s future, to have my own house and a small business to start with and be sucessful with it subsequently. Having only my faith and my dreams for my daughter with me, I valiantly go on and unfold my opportunity as an OFW.

Luckily, I was blessed to be employed in a very organize and human oriented company, working with caring professionals. My job hasn't been stressful but it was challenging enough for me to adjust at certain points.  I was being paid equally and on time. Not much of a hassle when it comes to work.  

“Home Sickness”, this is my daily struggle. It’s hard to fool yourself and pretend to be busy when you’re longing for an embrace of a True home.  It’s been 3 years and I thought I’ll get use to this emotion but I didn't. Yearning always feels like day one of my long journey.

There’s never a day I don’t miss my daughter, my nanay and tatay and my siblings, and when I miss them all I can do is to just close my eyes & bow my head, pray to god to bless me with more strength to make it through, to touch me with his healing hands so all the hurting s I'm feeling would just go away, to tell him that I trust in him and I believe that one day…all our sacrifices will pay off... one day I’ll see my family again and I’ll be wrapped around their loving arms and will be cuddled with their tightest hugs. ;)

SI BADETTE, ANG AKING KARIBAL

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Tawagin na lang natin sa pangalang Badette ang babaeng ito.

Sa 700+ friends ko sa Facebook, isa sya sa madalas na profile na aking ibinuview.

Tulad ngayon, Nag upload na naman sya ng bagong pictures sa facebook.

Ayos! May pagpefiestahan na naman ang aking mata sa pag suri ng kanyang anyo. Kung ano ang suot nyang blouse, sapatos, shorts o kung nakapantalon ba sya,kung anu man ang bitbit nyang bag, Kelangan kong ma check ang mga iyon!

Hindi yata ako papayag na mas in sya sakin. Lalo namang hindi ako papayag na matatalbugan nya ko sa pagandahan portion at pa astigan ng porma, hello? ako pa ba papakabog? Aba aba, Wala sa description sa CV ko ang ma ungusan ng iba partikular na ng babaitang ito!

Ang eksena, she went on a lunch & coffee date with her chums last Saturday. Wow, sounds sociable!

Agad agad kong chineck ang photos ng uploaded album nya na may title na “AN AFTERNOON DATE WITH MY SOUL SISTERS”. Ganun siguro ka “tight” ng bonding nila para tawagin nyang soul sisters ang dalawa nyang  friends na mga hindi naman kagandahan sa aking opinyon, pala ayos lang. Infairness, Nice album title ah.

Maayus ang pagkakamake up nya ngayon, Walang masyadong foundation. Normal na kasing tanawin sa previous photos nya ang parang nakapagmiryenda sya ng foundation. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero mukha sya laging humuhulas, masyado sigurong light para sa totoo nyang balat yung kulay ng foundation nya kaya konteng pawis lang, mukha nang natutunaw ang kanya mukha.  As usual, naka arko na naman ang kilay nya na guhitado ng eyeliner, rounded medium arch. Manipis.

Medyo sablay ang eye shadow nya, masyadong OA para sa okasyon, Neutral and plain ang ginamit nyang lipstick color, there’s nothing much going on, Boring. A lighter shade of pink blush on. Hindi akma ang mga koloreteng ikinulay nya sa kanyang kalakhang mukha. Sayang. Hindi sya kagandahan pero malakas ang karisma nya. May x factor ika nga. Kundangan lamang at maling pag aayos ang kanyang ginawa kaya hindi nabigyang hustisya ang kanyang charm.

She’s wearing a red & black checkered flowing sleeveless. Ummm, hindi nagcompliment sa morenang skin nya,  A khaki fitted trouser and a black flats, oversized (para sa kanyang height) na black handbag. Hindi ako na impress sa over all outfit nya. Tamang pang lunch o pang kape ang attire pero mali ang mga kombinasyon ng kulay at style ang kanyang ginamit. Hindi tulad nung mga nakaraang uploads nya. Napangisi ako, sa isip ko, “Mas kabog yung outfit ko nung huli ako nagpunta sa St*rbxcks”.

Hindi naman sa pagbubuhat ng sarili kong upuan (pero parang ganun na din), madalas akong mapuri sa aking pananamit.  Ordinaryo na sakin ang masabihan ng “nice outfit” o kaya naman ay “ you look fab”. Minsan nga pakiramdam ko eh iniinsulto na ko ng ibang tao dahil kahit simpleng white tee at fitted jeans lang ang suot ko, nadidinig ko pa rin ang mga ganung kataga. Naisabuhay ko yata kasi ang America’s Next Top Model, Para kong adik na ang tingin ko kay Tyra Banks  ay parang Si Chef Sandy Daza  sa tuwing nagtuturo sya ng mga pointers sa pagululuto. Dito ako nakakuha ng mga ideya sa tamang pananamit at isama mo narin ang gawing inspirasyon ang ilan sa aking mga paboritong star personalities like Jennifer Lawrence, Alexa Chung, Kirsten Dunst  at siyempre pa si Miley Cyrus (Take note, nagustuhan ko si miley mula nung nagbagong image sya, edgy + astig hairstyle).

 Casual Chic – yan ang aking forte, natutunan kong mag mix n match at mag color blocking, kapag plain ang aking suot, Loud accessories ang ipapartner ko, Pero most of the time I like to play it plain and simple. Less is more ika nga. Kaya ganun na lamang ang aking paghagalpak nung Makita ko yung outfit ni badette na nagpaalala din sakin sa kurtina ng PVP Liner Bus.

Siguro nga’y angat ako kay badette sa ibang bagay pero hindi ibig sabihin nun eh ako na ang bida! dahil kung gayon man, hindi ko na sana isinulat ang blog na ito.

Sanay din naman syang pumustura, sablay lang siguro nung nakipag afternoon date sya! Ang forte ni badette ay glam punk. Effortless sya pag ganyang tema.

Inuuri din ni badette ang bawat itsura ko. Madameng get together at okasyon na ang pinagsamahan namin at asahan mo na ang lahat ng yun ay tunggalian ng outfit naming dalawa! (Lamang ako dati pero ngayong nag gain ako ng timbang, lumalaban at bumabawi na si badette). Madalas din kaming magkahulihan ng tingin ng may ngiti, alam naman namin sa mga sarili namin na ang mga tinginang iyon  ay may halong pagmamatyag.

RIVALRY. Yan ang pinagsimulan ng lahat. Rivalry sa madameng bagay na kung iisa isahin ko eh baka malaman nyu na ang totoong pagkakakilanlan ng aking katunggaling si Badette.

Sa totoo lang may pinagsamahan din naman kami ni Badette. Ilang beses na naming napatunayan na halos magkamukha kami ng hilig sa madameng bagay. Mas liberated at agresibo lamang sya kesa sa kin. Kung ako ay frustrated model, si badette ay may reputasyon ng pagiging frustrated hooker/bitch. Matunog ang pangalan nya sa aming lugar sa larangan ng pagiging hitad, at ang nakakatawa dun, sya ay self proclaimed flirt. Sa kabila nito,  Madami din ang nahumaling sa kanya, mas madami sa mga naging boyfriend ko….ng seryoso.

Malayo sa hinagap ko na ipakilala ang aking sarili na kagaya ng kay badette. Sa pag uugali, malaki ang pinagka iba namin. Siya yung tipo na walang pakialam sa sinasabe ng iba at proud pa na matawag na alembong. Ako naman ay takot ma –labelan ng ganung marka. Sa kategoryang “Classy” ko hangad mapabilang. Ngunit may parte sa aking loob ang marahil nais maging gaya nya. May mga nakikita akong kulang sakin na nag uumapaw kay badette. Pihadong may kakulangan din sya s kanyang personalidad na marahil ay sobra naman sakin. 

Alam ko na hindi mabuting gawa ang ikumpara ang sarili sa kapwa. Pero hindi naman dahil ganyan  ang isang tao eh kampon na sya ng kasamaan. Tingnan natin  sa positibong aspeto. Sa aking halimbawa, Hindi ko ginagawa ito para ibaba ang pagkatao ni badette, sabihin na lang natin na sya ang aking “motivating Force” para hindi ma stuck sa typical na ako lang, o pwede ko bang sabihin na hindi lang talaga ko magpapakabog?

Para sayo badette, Alam kong binabasa mo to, wag kang anu jan! pasasaan ba’t sigurado kong gagawa ka din ng sarili mong blog site! Isa lang sana ang request ko, Let’s keep the competition Healthy! :)

OUR SWEET ESCAPE

And because of some holiday celebration here in Abu Dhabi, My husband and I had a Two-Day off just recently.

It's our chance to relax and shake out our stress and exhaustion from work, to run away from our worries and troubles! At the same time, it is also our chance to cope with our shortcomings as couples.

Our plan is to get a refreshing splash in a beach nearby, which we usually do whenever we have free time to share together, we’re beach buddies.  

I mean, we can hang out  there the whole day just wading in the seashore. We love walking in the sand while a slight surge of water is soaking our feet.  I don’t know but there’s a feeling of calmness. Just by staring at the wide range of blue water is breathtaking, like as if its boundless and would make you wonder what lies beyond the border. 

Anyways, we woke up early and geared up ourselves, both excited and overjoyed!

Here are some photos to give you an idea what took place on that ohh sooo happy day!!!

Thank you lord for giving us the chance to witness and enjoy your wonderful creation:

(Sunbathing bed is waiting for us)

 Some delectable’s to fuel our body and soul:

(In this photo are)

a.     Pork Adobo - My husband's favorite

b.     Hotdogs -  Just a quick fix!

c.      Milk bread

d.     Mayo & Egg Spread

e.     Grilled fish stuffed with tomato, onions & other spices

f.      Steam Rice

(There’s also some fish crackers and soda’s  but weren’t included in the picture)

My husband wrote our names in the sand and too bad its not as clear as it should be  

(it’s supposed to be JARREL & LESLEY)

The rectangular woodwork is the open cottage where you can rest and put all your stuffs

Instead of resting in the cottage, my husband preferred to lay down in the sand!!!

Me posing at the cottage!!!

There were birds playing with us ... so adorable!

Headed for some water dippin’
( didn't wear my swimsuit today because its freezing cold :P )

That magical moment when you’re hand in hand with your partner while the soft glowing light from the sky sets down when the sun is below the horizon.

It's days like this when you just want to stop the time and get stuck in that magnificent moment :)

'til our next beach visit!

WEARING MY HEART OUT ON MY SLEEVE

(So Here I am again making another attempt to write a blog after a couple of months of being stuck and lazy)

Being raised in a rustic town  surrounded with old-fashioned people living in their traditional faith, I grew up in full belief that women (and men) with tattoo is synonymous to being a hooker, a convicted prisoner, a member of any villain gangster, a thug or anything alike to those categories.

My parents are the usual conservative type. My father  doesn’t have any ink markings on his body, and so as I my mother.  I can still recall how they disapprove the appearance of a well known personality embroidered with tattoos on his arms  while watching our favorite TV program. Those conversations have somewhat sink in to me and growing up, my interpretation  of having a tattoo is  something that  won’t make you look presentable and would instead make you look like a person who is “up to no good”. To have a tattoo visible to others is like openly giving an idea that you have a bad reputation, someone that wont gain respect from others. This kind of judgment lasted while I was still a child.

It’s a sudden change of heart for me.

And so I realized that any person has liberty and can freely decide if he/ she wants to be tatted and  marked permanently with ink. It’s their right and it’s their body anyways. Whether we like it or not, our option is to just respect their rights or to just be negative critics.

A tattoo doesn't define you as a human being, your character does. I mean for instance, there's this person tatted all  over his body and another person looking so damn clean and neat and presentable, a homeless man approach for help  and between the tatted dude & Mr. Presentable looking oh so fine, the guy portraying a bad a$$ image on the outside willingly and wholeheartedly help the vagabond. See? Physical appearance shouldn't always be a reference.  

 A tattoo is an expression of love for people so dear to us, for people we respect and to whoever we want to give tribute to. It is a representation of something precious and it doesn't necessarily represent  how pleasing you are as a person.  It is instead individuality and boldness and I don’t see anything wrong with those.

I am now a buff  who appreciate the beauty and the art of a tattoo. I guess I am just being open minded and receptive to what currently exists in our modern society.

And so I decided to get inked on my left wrist. It is to represent the love I have for my daughter and to signify the fulfilling pleasure of being a mother.

Here, take a look  at some of my photos while on session:

He started with the outline

FAITH is the name of my daughter and the unfinished outline signifies a mother and daughter  embracing each other. cute isnt it? :)

It's painful at first, but it's bearable :)

The finish product! small in size but it deeply means a lot!

And though some others are still “condemning” me for getting inked, I am amazed that most of the people around me appreciate my ink markings. They find it awesome and brave. :)

NEW HOPE IS DAWNING

I woke up today at  5:00am.

A Good start to my morning is a cup of hot black coffee so I immediately grab the coffee maker, plug it on and wait for my  brewed to be ready.

I felt cold and noticed that My window's misting up.  A/C's set to 16' degree, wearing only an oversized white shirt & a  boyleg short  almost freeze me to death so I shut off the A/C.

I poured my coffee on my fave cup, stir it  a bit while standing on the right window corner .  Its already 5:12am and it is still dark outside.

The view from the 9th floor of the building where I currently reside showcases the east-west side of Abu Dhabi City. All you can see are tall buildings  in different shapes and futuristic designs. my favorite is the Domain skyscraper located right in the middle  & is being surrounded by semi tall buildings. It is a stunning attraction, three spires standing tall (tallest in the middle)  with bright fancy lights all over it. Next is the etisalat tower designed with a huge  golf ball like stuff on its top. Its majestic! My eyes are widely awakened by those beautiful buildings….its really an amazing view up here.

THIS BLOG claims no credit for any images posted on this site unless otherwise noted. Images on this blog are copyright to its respectful owners. If there is an image appearing on this blog that belongs to you and do not wish for it appear on this site, please E-mail with a link to said image and it will be promptly removed.

I was slightly blinded by the flashing lights of cars and other vehicles passing by the main road. It’s a busy street down there. It is still early but  many people are already walking down and on their way to work or to wherever they are bound to go.

This is the life of most expatriates here in Abu Dhabi, waking up early to prepare for  8-12 hours work,  go home in the afternoon, cook for dinner (Left overs are for breakfast the next day & still might be a packed food for lunch.). If we have time some of us will browse online to check out the latest happenings back home, others would watch their fave telenovelas. As for me, I’d usually hop in to the room of my friends for a small chit chat, joke around and get some good laughs.

I checked on the time and its already five past six, I'm sippin' my coffee, puffing a cigarette.  It is time for me to head for shower cuz  the bus service will pick me up at 0625am.

It’s a different day today. There’s a feeling of peace, calmness & assurance. A new hope is dawning.

I’m smiling big today!

A MIRROR THAT REFLECTS TRUE BEAUTY

Visible dark circles under my eyes, forming lines…  must be wrinkles! 3 medium size pimples on my forehead, looking like it's due to pop out any moment. Another one on my left cheek, almost healed and is now peeling off. These are  some of the ghastly details visible in my face while staring at the mirror.

My lips’ fine. It must be the canola-honey balm stick ( Gifted to me from Korea) that’s keeping it supple despite the heavy nicotine it endures since I’m back into smoking again…  You can tell that its slightly burned. But that doesn’t stop me from lightin’’ up one stick of my Esse menthol, I puffed the filter, gasp a bit and finally release the remaining smoke produced in my mouth.

While puffing my cigarette, I am still staring at the reflection in the mirror .. This time focusing on the nose part. It looks good. There’s nothing much going on.

I put down my cigarette for a while on an ashtray beside me and went back to my business of inspecting my appearance.

My eye brows’ quite messy.  I had it shaped thru “ threading” last month, a Moroccan lady did it and cost me AED 20 in return. She’s an expert in shaping brows. Now there’s already  growing hair in some areas.  I reached for my tweezers and began pulling the unwanted hairs one by one until it's back on its clean shape.

My hair looks healthy and awesome. Had it cut, styled & dyed in loud color just recently, seeing my hair nice & flowing sends a smile on my face. “you gooow girl!!” in my mind, now I’m smirking.

I touched my face & there's some rough areas around, dry skin it is!

I can tell that the “piercing” stares of my eyes is ratifying how exhausted the person is in front of the mirror. Long hours & stressed at work, financial matters, relationship etc. etc.  are few of my many daily struggles in life and I guess this contributes big time to my poor outward appearance.

A one on one encounter with myself in the mirror is somewhat creepy, weird and crazy. It made me realize a lot of things. Like I am getting old, looking less attractive, losing my confidence based on my physical attributes. But above this, it made me realize that,  “That woman in the mirror who lose her charm & physical beauty have gone through so much in life, been beaten out with misfortunes but she remain tough, she is still breathing, fiercer than ever. That woman is me.

Changes in our physical appearance as we grow old is inevitable. Every little details in our face & body  will change in due time, physical beauty has its expiration. But the beauty & strength  we have within, that's natural, therefore its everlasting. That’s what we need to keep and emanate because it gives a blooming reflection outside, that’s real beauty.

I am a beautiful person  because God made me that way. :)

I do not own any on this video. no copyright infringement intended

WISHIN' FOR DOPEY DAYS TO BE OVER

Heavyhearted.

I don’t know what's with me but I feel so tired, lazy, heavy, sluggish , tardy & other words that are synonymous.

I'm a buzzer beater. My bus service is passing by my place at 0625-0630 in the morning daily and because I woke up late,  got  almost left behind . I am thinking maybe the bus driver is sooo irked at me cuz for five days now, he’s waiting with no choice in our pick up area. Taking taxi is not reasonable. It will cost me around AED 30-35 which could have been my meal allowance for the whole day.

While seated on the first row of the bus, I began to recollect... the past days have been so complex.

* Cai is coming 2 weeks from now so we have to transfer to a bigger flat. Finding a new place is arduous for me cuz I have to do it while at work, browsing online for possible prospects, contact the owner, negotiate with them and after work I need to drop by to check the place in actual. Can you imagine the stress of joggling work (11 hours a day) while searching for a new home and the feeling of being pressured  because we need to transfer immediately?

*   *The land lady in the flat where I am currently living is acting so damn shoddy that I've

already  reached the point where I just want to punch her face and  clog her mouth with used socks soaked with disinfectant because she won’t stop talking!!! She was so pissed when I told her that I will transfer to a new abode, then her other tenants started to inform her too that they will also relocate.  D f*ck is wrong with that granny dressin’ like a slut?! Its not like as if I told her tenants to leave along with me too?!

 And because my parents taught me not to argue specially with people of older age(s), here I am sitting with my mouth shut J I didn’t fight back, didn’t revert even once to her cursed words, All she see is my faux angelic face & A strained sweet smile in front of her, feigning to be receptive to all her demonic talk . but in my mind I just want to brutally hurt her. Oh dear lord forgive me but she’s giving me so much stress!

* And yes, my husband and I had initially moved some of our stuffs to our new flat. We were porters for 2 nights now and that made me sooo tired L We have other stuffs to haul and we’re doing it tonight.. aghhh

d    *Alarmed of my ever increasing weight. I want to do running & biking again(which I did last year) cuz it indeed made me all toned up. But because of my laziness, I just don’t want to do it.

THIS BLOG claims no credit for any images posted on this site unless otherwise noted. Images on this blog are copyright to its respectful owners. If there is an image appearing on this blog that belongs to you and do not wish for it appear on this site, please E-mail with a link to said image and it will be promptly removed.

‘Em .. praying that tomorrow will be a bright day for me.
<photo borrowed from google>

JEALOUS OF HUBBY'S KD 5?

And so my husband is soooo awestruck with his new ballmate!!!

And because its his first payday, he treat his self with this KD 5 (Kevin Durant?) basketball shoes.

I feel happy seeing him so overjoyed owning a pair of it! But part of me is agitated because I know that this new shoes will make him play basketball  more often. Do I sound selfish? hahaha! I just hope he will consider  that  our hectic work schedule wont allow us to see each other and bond regularly.

Our rest day's every Friday and its our only chance to talk to share stories to joke & play around as couple but since he has this new shoes to show off, I bet this will steal our bonding moment. In fact he's officially teamed up with other Filipinos here in Abu Dhabi to play in a Tourna. Ughh, Should I throw his KD5?

yeah right, it's me talking nonsense again :P

TO THE MAN WHO STOLE MY HEART

As I look back over the past ten years, I remember how unprepared we were to face married life. The only thing that we are sure by that time is the feeling of wanting & loving each other. We don’t know what lies ahead, ALL WE KNOW IS THAT WHATEVER THE FUTURE HOLD, WE WILL DO IT TOGETHER.

I must say that living’ together hasn’t always been easy.  I mean, every relationship has its own taste of sourness, who’s to say theirs was perfectly sweet?  The word “mismatched” would perhaps describe us as a couple. WE ARE THE EXACT OPPOSITE. You are a teaser and I am the sensitive type, I easily get mad when you play around. I talk too much and you are the kind who won't say a word most especially during our arguments. I am always ready for a debate and I am always expecting you to roar back at me but you are the type who won't shed an explanation. Despite all of this, we are so willing to accept our differences. Love is always there to give balance and to fill in our incompatibilities.

We’ve been through hard times, we’ve experienced joys, we’ve shared laughter & pains, and we’ve had our ups & downs, LIFE IS NEVER PERFECT…BUT IT’S BEAUTIFUL.  We were blessed to have an amazing, beautiful child (the most precious gift we received from God). Our love has grown deeper with each passing year and it’s been a decade full of true love, happiness and lessons in life.

We may be clueless of what the next ten years would bring but as we walk down that road, I promise to always be right there to hold your hand, to be as resilient as I can when we walk through the stumbling blocks, to be the source of your strength when you’re frail, to be more patient, understanding, to always be there for you at all times. I promise to be the best mother I can be to our child and to be all you need as a wife and as a partner in life.

I will always want you, I will always love you.

THE "IMELDA" IN ME

I was not born well heeled. In fact, I came from an underprivileged family.  My father is a laborer while my mother is an embroiderer, I am the eldest, I have a sister who is 3 years younger than me.

Combining both my parents’ wages, our family could only afford to pay for our daily meal and nothing more back in the day. Having a very limited income made me & my sister to have very limited stuffs like clothes, toys, shoes etc. I could still remember how my mother will gather all the scrapped fabric from her work so she could sew for us some casual dresses as we can’t afford to buy a ready-made. Our shoes were mostly used ones, those that were “donated” from my cousins & neighbors.

I was an ordinary kid. I grew up with some friends from the neighborhood and classmates at school. I love to play and hang out with them.  School programs, birthday parties, social gatherings, various events & activities etc… that’s what I love the most when I was still a child, it excite me! I love to check out what others are wearing whenever there’s activity at school or if there’s any celebration. I am an extrovert.

I have this huge fascination for shoes. I don’t know why but my eyes “gleams” the most on any pair of new shoes, especially flat ones designed with simplicity & elegance.

I love Cinderella and her glass shoe that shines like crystals, it inspired me knowing that the essence of her story is about a girl who finds her way from rags to riches.

I love Mrs.  Marcos and her more than a hundred pair of shoes. I love her grandiosity & charm; I love her as a woman. Although I despise the possibility that she spent the money of the Filipinos for her lavish lifestyle.

My father & mother were my best mentors & advice givers. They were the best for making me understand that though glamour may be impossible for me back then because of our financial condition, there will come a day when all the shoes I want can be easily mine  through perseverance and hard work. Infact, I am always told that anything I want in life can be mine if I work for it with determination and unfailing faith. That’s when I told myself that when I grow up, I will buy every shoe that I can afford to buy!

I went to high school & managed to graduate college using the same & only pair of shoes I have and that same shoes I wore the first time I landed myself a job. On my first pay day, I scored myself with a black ballerina flats from Parisian Junior. I can’t contain myself with happiness! From that day that I have my own source of income, I pampered myself with every pair of shoes that I can afford to buy.

Today, I have 42 pairs (to be exact) of shoes (in different average brands, nothing extravagant), Please don’t misconstrue that I am bragging about it, that’s not what I intend to do.  It just came to me & was reminded that I was once a child with a “little Imelda” in my heart for being so awestruck with shoes… but was unlucky & deprived to own enough pairs of it.

And unlike with other’s denunciation to the former First Lady (on how she acquired her luxurious shoe collection) I worked doggedly to pay for every cent of the shoes I own. :)

mixed pairs

one of my fave open-toe flats

comfy

wedge & sexy

sporty

smart casual

newest member 

soon to come, my latest prospect

all time fave

TO MY DEAR NANAY

While looking at this picture, I caught myself draped with mixed feelings.

This photo was taken last month when I went home for vacation. I was laughing to myself when I noticed how funny my face was while I’m giving you a kiss. I was in the mood of joking with you that time, playing and goofing around. We were laughing all day. It was one of my cherished and happiest days.

Glancing at your face, I began to notice how time has taken your youth & how your illness (which you’ve suffered from for more than a year now) has stolen your former glow. That’s when I felt a sudden twinge in my heart. The smile on my face has been replaced with melancholy.

 I felt the guilt of not being there to take care of you becauseI can’t remember a day that you’re not there for me especially during hard times.

I may not be with you everyday but that doesn’t mean that I don’t care for you at all. Though distance may keep us apart, Lord knows how hard I pray each and every single day for your fast recovery, for everyday protection and for a lengthened life to be showered upon you. 

Through praying I find real comfort, this is the best way I know to express how much you mean to me and how much I care about you, There’s never a day that I don’t think of you, you are in my mind and in my heart every single day of my life.

I love you and I am so blessed to have you as my mother.